Are you scared to do the sacred !

In last two days, read two self-retaliation, or just self-advertising, may be self-actualization; don't plan to analyse currently thou on the nature or the purpose of confessions. What I felt was a voice of an alter-ego, is it actually, at-least believe it to be. The point here is how much of the 'integrating' or the 'morality' towards oneself, encompassing for those whom we, or for the objective of, work, have we or we want. Of course the objectivity could be different, based on ...

Doing the right, doesn't necessary is right anymore, or may, depending on how big your pay-check can influence, the subsequent as well. So, shall we get and be part of the herd; I am definitely not saying, I don't - as the recent exemplification of the action that I have taken have been influenced not by the purpose but for multiple reasons, of being in-league of trendiness, overcome self-implied judgmental provocativeness, was an unfitting decision. But, the consoling part of the behavior is the non-obligatory nature of the disposition on self-indulgence....
Didn't find any further to add as of now ---

History Repeats

Few minutes back, I notices the Chase Bank website is not responding for customer login. I thought about this writing not to be critical on the site or the bank, but back here again just to share some thoughts. I will though come back to it later thou, and would like to share what happened in between.

My notion so far, was, banking probably may be one sector where the company might not be able to afford to restrict it services for whatsoever reason to not their consumers. But why so? Bearing the same, my first thought was to validate (and being a techie, as I personally feel about myself) the home frontier, for accessibility. No, to my dismay, also fortune for a simple and selfish reason, my visit was not time critical.

Now, about the power of the media, it was difficult to believe that no news items, that I could found on Google, was published. The search also revealed - 

a. The site has been down in the past, with much ado, and subservience around the news (its being almost a year and a half - 14th Sep 2010)

b. The service index (subjective) of the service industry we (people on the net) need credibility towards - to which my reading does not give me a lot of proud for what prejudice, I carry. 

And this is thought, where the inclination of historic (banking) usage reminds of, taking away from the 'taken-for-granted' infinitival demand for accessibility.

Ye dil bhi zid pe adaa hai kisi bachche ki tarah, Ya to sab kuch hi isse chahiye ya kuch bhi nahi! 

(Our heart is being stubborn, of either getting everything or nothing)

What's next !!!

Browsing through the pile of really old mails, encountered a piece to cherish, and so thought of sharing.

Thanks to all the friends and sharing the joyous script-lets.

To all have a nice and wonderful day and days ahead.

Gone are the days
When the school reopened in June,
And we settled in our new desks and benches.

Gone are the days
When we queued up in book depot,
And got our new books and notes.

Gone are the days
When we wanted two Sundays and no Mondays, yet
Managed to line up daily for the morning prayers.

Gone are the days
When we chased one another in the corridors in Intervals,
And returned to the classrooms drenched in sweat.

Gone are the days
When we had lunch in classrooms, corridors,
Playgrounds, under the trees and even in cycle sheds.

Gone are the days
When a single P.T. period in the week's Time Table, Was awaited more
eagerly than the monsoons.

Gone are the days
Of fights but no conspiracies,
Of Competitions but seldom jealousy.

Gone are the days
When we used to watch Live Cricket telecast,
In the opposite house in Intervals and Lunch breaks.

Gone are the days
When few rushed at 5:30 to
"Conquer" window seats in our School bus.

Gone are the days
Of Sports Day, and the annual School Day,
And the one-month long preparations for them.

Gone are the days
Of the stressful Quarterly, Half Yearly and Annual Exams,
And the most enjoyed holidays after them.

Gone are the days
We learnt, we enjoyed, we played, we won, we lost, We laughed, we cried,
we fought, we thought.

Gone are the days
With so much fun in them, so many friends,
So much experience, all this and more.

Gone are the days
But not the memories, which will be
Lingering in our hearts for ever and ever and
Ever and ever and Ever.

I hope you went back to your Golden Olden days..........

For a while..........as I DID!!

Didn’t u????

I m frustrated

Working on an issue, between a vendor and a client for last 3 months, I kept as much calm 'as needed' (won't say as much possible). So far, got baffled many a times either by vendors in-responsive or from within the client team itself (for whom its - pain in the neck).

Still ... :)

Finally, 2 days back, vendor passed the buck ... again, this time on contribution from development team. And, being a ping-pong ball in this game (sophisticated way of putting - coordinating), focus drifted in finding out what and why of the current solution-state (stating it as 'problem', after so long, just aggravates the dis-appointment of how, preference of saying "not my problem" over "lets get it done" seems to observed by too many - that's my count-of course), gathering evidence (being a case - even though not of court-room), and victims (I couldn't find a better correlation with problem-solver; because they are most desperate, of the circumstance).
Yeah, back to the topic ... for those whom I considered victim, desirable to obtain solution, might not surely be - again just because there is always a trenchant gap between 'should' and 'would' has in the real world (again, prospective).

I learnt, guts you have can proportionate to fact denial ability. How: "Benefit" of organized systems gives traceability; but there is always known difference between responsibility and accountability - I believe an analogy possible here is with 'should-ness' n 'would-ness'.

Adding this, after writing last statement:
Raze of frustration - thought of reminding (more than anything - wanted to preach) those "I" considered irresponsible. So, I did 2 things - actually one followed another - as thought are never stable (now, I feel, good that I took long enough for breeze of thoughts to pass by) ... Oh, the 2 things.
Very angry, I wrote to all, victimizing my own self, feeling self pity; in thought of being righteousness; all that I wanted to preach ..., but ... yes, a but here - didn't post. Why ? - scared of authority; being righteousness; horoscope read - 'watch your voice in official correspondence' (not sure, what exactly, but some / sum of all contributed)
2nd re leaved - frustration (here ... )

I still prefer remaining victim to aspire.

Ideas are never even DORMANT "<>" !

Few days back my wife asked me to go thru bigB's blog. She has been thru his blog a few times and found great writing, even inspiring. I definitely has no doubt in her saying because of 2 facts here ...

1. I myself am a very big admirer of AB
2. Of-course the suggestion was from my wife, - should-not be considered inappropirate.

So, I finally made up my mind to know my admiration better. Oct 1/2 is the entry that I read, I kept reading on n on n on ... but could not make any sense out of it. I don't mean, by saying this, by any means there is any complexity in the ariticle or AB was not making sence, which as per me is not possible, at al. But, I feel, I was not in a mood to absorb anything. Last couple of days or kinda weeks, that I am in no mood of doing anything. I always questioned, how could anyone, at anytime be in state of not willing to do anything. Now, I do realize and am empathetic with the idea of not doing anything, but antagonize the person's state of affairs which would have led to the situation. Coming back to, why I generally write ... thoughts never stop, my belief so does the pouring of the ideas.

- Now, my idea with the incidence, while reading the article, there is possibility to post my personal reference in THE comment section, at-least wouold catch attention of some. This is backed by my craving of popularizing my thoughts, only with intent of inculcation of thought provocation. Subsequently with the thought of righteaousness of using SOMEONE, by traspassing, does not feel right.

But, if there could a debate and a conclusive remark making inclination suggesting a possibility of utilzing this IDEA's mode for advertising thoughts !!!

Thanks to my WIFE & AB

Is truth bitter ? It is always !!!

I don't know the passivity of this note ...

• Insight - This guy has multiple perspective, he may induce thoughtfulness in other. OTHERs will stop following someone 'blindly'.
• Principle - There is never a right time to do the right thing. That may bring out mistakes committed. Let the secret die with you. Sharing knowledge is dangerous.
• Inclusive - Team work is completing individual activity, setting composed in a middle of chaos.
• Straight forward - Do not talk about problem unless you have the solution. Since, no solution comes from discussion / experiential inputs. Only an individual and only can individual and no team / group can devise solution.

Greatest of all my discoveries ---

• Leader - Can you mis-lead other enough / hide what is planned for an individual from the same whereas the world know everything, being written all over. Penalize people hard enough to set example for their hideous crimes - of bringing thoughtfulness by not offering fish but to teach how to fish; motivate people by shaking them hard enough to awaken from their sleeps; talk about eliminating mundane, monotoned, laboriousness, machine molded frame of mind by perseverance to excel in attempting to achieve parallelized quality and efficiency.

Along came the spider !

Did itt ! (extra 't' is intentional ... ll talk about it later)

'Taking chance w a partner or a stalker ... what would I perfer ?'

Most people, if the person is intelligent, as partner. I think, I feel it different, I would perfer to my chance with stalker. Amased !

I have a theory, Partner, may (and may not will / would) think in the line of conterpart; wheras S would definitely not, for sure evalulate things critically. Perference for stalker, talking of possiblity: can work for safety, a gardian; additional information, which is always key to any game, informer; ... utlize to capacity, not their but yours. All this in the direction, where you are not looking into, you don't want to look into.

Of course, the back-ground, from where the choice comes from is that of (same) objectivity.

Now, for one not on my side:

My feel, again (sorry to bore) - Never, & for sure never should one mistake of not admiring opponent. More than the (the) challenge, it (does not mean in-animate) gives 2 other important things ... 1 - somewhere within is the answer to over-power; 2 - gives strenght or anguish or hatred to overcome; 3 - (i knew there will be 3) teacher, everything absolutly everything is.

Apologies, for extra 't', just that I didn't feel like clearing it off, and the interest.

Be playful with thoughts.

Spider, is metaphor for mind weaving a web of conspiracy, emotions, desires ... (oops limited vocab)

Often told by spiritual guru, thoughtlessness is best state of mind, dead spider. Once heard you cannot kill spidy without dieing, you can tranquilize. I am deviating ... see the power, lets get back. Another, point before forward march ('tej chal'), thou there are uncontrolled moments where spider comes to stand still. Ever wondered why ! I am. Is it the right state ! Has the web grown enough, we don't need to weave further ! Could it sence of contentment for mind ! Then why have had evovled from homo sapiens.